Of Joy and Sorrow

 

“Joy and sorrow are like milk and cookies. That’s how well they go together.” ~ Neil Gaiman

[A woman asked The Prophet to speak about joy and sorrow. And he answered:

Your joy is your sorrow unmasked.

And the selfsame well from which your laughter rises was oftentimes filled with your tears.

And how else can it be?

The deeper that sorrow carves into your being, the more joy you can contain.

Is not the cup that holds your wine the very cup that was burned in the potter’s oven?

And is not the lute that soothes your spirit, the very wood that was hollowed with knives?

When you are joyous, look deep into your heart and you shall find it is only that which has given you sorrow that is giving you joy.

When you are sorrowful look again in your heart, and you shall see that in truth you are weeping for that which has been your delight.

Some of you say, “Joy is greater than sorrow,” and others say, “Nay, sorrow is the greater.”

But I say unto you, they are inseparable.

Together they come, and when one sits alone with you at your board, remember that the other is asleep upon your bed.]

~The Prophet, Kahlil Gibran

Joy and sorrow are indeed twins that travel together. Never does one dominate the scene for too long before the other shows up. As days are added to my experience of life, I am realizing that it not a vindictive dance. I used to think that if I was too happy, something would surely come to mess it up because life just doesn’t like people being too happy all the time.

Kahlil cured me of that misconception. In life joy and sorrow are conjoined twins. Sorrow often springs up from our joy and joy from our sorrow. And it is this understanding that makes it easier to cope with the ebb and flow of a melancholic personality. When I’m high up on a crest I can clearly see how low the trough will drop me and probably also easily calculate the velocity of my fall. This makes it hard to be so excited about the high points but I also realistically live with the full realization of the depths to which I can sink. And knowing so, I take the time to find and cultivate mitigating beliefs, and activities.

I have learnt that not all sorrow is supposed to be avoided. In fact, some sorrows need to be actively sought, periodically. And in fact, we sometimes experience our best learning in the pain rather than in times of joy.  In the silence of sorrow, may I find lessons to keep me grounded in the happiness of joy.

“Joy and sorrow are the light and shade of life; without light and shade no picture is clear.”~ Hazrat Inayat Khan